Things NOT to do/say to a 5 month old baby and/or her mommy:

**Disclaimer: All of these scenarios have happened to us. Some I can laugh at, some just annoy me and others are unacceptable. Most of the time I don't say anything because I don't want to cause a scene or because I'm too shocked that someone would have the nerve to do whatever it is that they just did. But if it's harming my baby, than I have said and will say something about it. I hope nothing offends anyone. I love that you love my baby, but I am her Mommy and I reserve the right to raise her as I see fit and to shelter her if I wish. This post was just meant to record some of my not-so-pleasant mommy experiences, not lecture any one (and I think all of these apply to strangers or people I barely know, so it most likely doesn't apply to you).**


10. If you are a complete stranger, please don't offer to hold my baby for me while I eat. It's not going to happen. I don't care if you are Michelle Duggar and have 18 (19) kids of your own, if I don't know you, I'm not going to let you hold her.

9. If you don't know me, please do not call my baby fat. It's rude. Yes, she has big round cheeks and rolls all over her body and is in the 90th percentile for her weight. But she is a baby and is perfectly healthy. There are plenty of acceptable terms to use besides "fat". Chubby, chunky, rolley-polley, fluffy, big, round, healthy. I know this seems stupid, but you wouldn't go up to a complete stranger and call them fat (I hope you wouldn't anyway...) so if you are a stranger to me, don't call my baby fat.


8. Do not argue with me over whether or not my child's car seat will fit in the highchair at any given restaurant. It won't fit. I've tried them at almost every restaurant and it's just bigger than most car seats. It. Will. Not. Fit.

7. Do not use a personal pronoun, such as he or she, his or her, unless you know the sex of my baby. Really, you can't tell that she's a girl from all of the pink she has on and the HUGE bow on the top of her head.

6. Don't judge me for warming my pumped, bagged breast milk under the water in the bathroom of a restaurant. If my child is hungry, I'm going to feed her and at least I'm not pulling my boob out to do so (NOT that there is ANYTHING wrong with that if done discretely.)

5. Don't let your 2 year old come up to my baby and touch her hands and face, especially after they have just coughed all over the place.

4. Don't stare at my boobs when asking about whether she is breastfed or not. Yes, she is and yes, they are big. Get over it. Also don't check me out while I'm holding my baby. I'm NOT interested and you are a perv!!


3. Don't watch and do nothing while your 2 year old hits my baby in the head with his toy truck. When she is older and can fend for herself, not a big deal, but right now, not cool!

2. Don't get up in my baby's face and breathe all over her unless you are (1) not sick and (2) her mommy, daddy, grandparent, aunt/uncle, or close friend. And especially don't if you have just finished a cigarette. That's gross and no one appreciates that. Brush your teeth!

1. Do not under any circumstances dip your finger in something (like cake icing) and stick it in my child's mouth! I don't appreciate my child getting a mouth full of pure sugar or a mouth full of whatever germs are on your finger. Also, she could have a family history of food allergies that you don't know about and can't have any of the chosen food that you just gave her. If I wanted her to eat whatever you want to give her, I would have already fed it to her. I don't care how old your baby was when you started giving him or her table food, I have chosen to not start that yet and you should respect that. If you want to feed my baby, ask me what she can have and if you could give it to her. I have the right to determine what goes in her mouth and when. No, I'm not a control freak, but some things are just not appropriate.

Now some things that I'd love for you to do/say:


1. Dote over my baby all you want. I will never be sick of anyone telling me how cute, adorable, darling, beautiful, sweet, etc., etc. my baby is. I share your opinion.

2. Share your baby stories with me. I like to see how all babies are different and develop certain milestones at different stages. But, do NOT turn it into a competition. If your baby came out of the womb walking, then good for him. That just means you had less time to soak up the joys of having a baby that stays where you put her. :) And whether your baby was super quick, super slow or just in the middle for reaching those milestones, it reflects nothing on your performance as a mother (just so you know...). (Apparently I had one more thing for my what NOT to do list and I didn't even know it.)

3. Offer to babysit all you want. I may or may not take you up on the offer (not based on you, but based on my need to be around my child every moment I am not at work), but it's nice to hear that you want to spend time with my baby.

4. Shop for baby clothes to your hearts content! I will never turn down cute little baby clothes (or passed down hand-me-downs) .

5. Love my child. I will always welcome people who love my baby! I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone who loves my child! I LOVE that you love my baby, I just ask that you respect what is best for her.